Pooped Pup

Wow! I never thought I'd see the day where Daisy was too pooped to play. We took her to see the kids on Saturday and while JF and J were doing a softball catch and hit session for JF to get herself prepared for a company picnic softball game, Daisy and I played on the playground with the kids. Actually, I spent the time playing with the kids and Daisy just ran and ran and ran through all the grassy fields and the wood chips covering the ground where the playground equipment is and across the tarmac filing her nails as she ran. She did stop to poop on the third base line which J had to bag up so no kids ended up with poop feet, but that's about it. We were there well over an hour and she didn't crash until I sat down with the kids for a drink, then Daisy crashed at my side and sprawled out trying to get some coolness from the grass. I gave her water in the frisbee R and I had been using and she lapped that up in two seconds. Today, she is lazing around the house, still following me if I move from floor to floor, but she flops herself down as soon as she determines I am staying on that level for a while. She is one tired dog! I'm so glad! I guess I should do that more often. I even bought a new basket for all her toys, gathered all the toys, put them in the basket and showed it to her. She looked, stuck her nose in to sniff several toys, and then lay down next to it to go back to sleep. No playing today--she's too pooped!

Chicken

Okay, so I'm a chicken! I wanted to go to the MFA with M but I thought maybe it would be better if I were the one driving. Yeah, she's more familiar with the streets of Boston than me, but she DID fail her driver's license eye exam the last two times and only gets a license renewed because her opthalmologist writes a letter to the DMV so she can continue to drive. She won't drive at night (thank God) but continues to drive otherwise. Yes, she's as careful as she can be about her driving, but when she tells me from across the living room, " I can't see you but I do see a shadow moving in front of the mirror," I figure it's safer for all involved (and innocent bystanders) if I am the one driving while she reads directions to me. The last time I let her be the driver when we went into Boston, she almost scraped along the Jersey barriers on the highway down there and ran over a curb taking a right turn while in Boston. I almost pooped my pants, thinking I was a goner that day! The worst part was, she had no idea that she came so close to making hamburger out of us. I don't want to hurt her feelings, but I do want to live a good long life, so I just told her that I was in love with my Saab and I really enjoyed driving it so I would drive and she could navigate. M has a new car too, but she fell for that excuse this time. I dread when the time comes that I have to tell her how scared I am of her driving. It will hurt her feelings terribly. Last night (still light out) she drove us to the nearby restaurant for dinner and I thought she did fairly well on a very familiar route (5 minutes from her place), except that she didn't see this HUGE pot hole right in front of us that she could have avoided by a mile had she been able to identify it. Wham! Into the pothole with her brand new car. I tried to warn her when I realized she was headed for it, but she bulldozed right toward it and all I could do was hold on tight! It was teeth rattling. She said she only saw a dark spot and thought maybe it was a puddle. I know she's only 63 and she still needs to earn a living, but I'm not so sure that loophole of a doctor writing a note to renew your license is such a good idea. How many more Ms are there out there doing the same kind of driving? I don't want to be around to see anything bad happen because they really can't see well enough to react quickly to avoid accidents. Yikes! I wonder if that's how that 83 year old man who ran into me and then into my car got his license renewed?

Was It Something I Said??

I knew J was coming in late, because of a doctor's appointment. But P was due in at 8:00, so no problem. Then C at 8:30 and K and T at 9:00...no sweat. While I'm waiting, a deer shows up on our hillside, right near the big forsythia bush. It's a boy with little antlers, about a year old. He's grazing quite contentedly. There's no one to share this with, so I call DB to see if she can see him from her office. She comes in to our office to observe. He stays for a few minutes, circling around so we can view him from all angles. How cute! 8:00 comes and goes; no P. 8:30 comes and goes; no P OR C...what;s going on??? Is someone or something highjacking my co-workers? Phones were steady and I needed to pee desperately. Surely someone knows where they are. I called D in Kingston...is C there? Did we screw up and think she was coming in here today? No C. I called JD...I think I'm looking at the right, most recent updated schedule.... where are my work buddies? JD doesn't know ...says they should both be here....WHAT'S HAPPENING OUT THERE?? Finally T shows up a couple minutes before 9....okay, no conspiracy. I run for the bathroom after expressing how happy I am to see her. When I come out DB is trying to explain why C is not here. One of her schedules says she is due in at 10...the other, the one I looked at, says she's here at 8:30. Geez, no wonder we're all confused! Poor P...she had an old schedule up at home and she really thought she was due in at 9:30...and showed up then. Unfortunately, now she has to stay until 6, the one early day she was scheduled for this week and she missed it. I really hope tomorrow is back to normal, whatever normal is these days.

Ahhh! Relief!

Getting the haircut, manicure and pedicure today was the best thing I've done for myself in a long time! My hair is cut short, shorter than its been the entire 11 years I've lived in NH, but not as short as I have had it in the past. The stylist kept asking if I was sure I wanted to go this short and I said yes, yes, yes. I have happy hands, happy feet and now a very happy head!! :) I don't care if no one else likes it, it makes me happy and that's what I set out to do. I love my new stylist, S and will be seeing her again. After all, we have a "relationship" now. She loved up my feet and hands today and that head massage included with the cut is heavenly. I have to say, Xian you're right. Supercuts is like fast food. Salon 72 was a modern day Eden.

Another haircut!

I've HAD it!! I can't stand my hair any more. I dyed it too dark. There's too much of it, and it's too hot; I need a change and I think I'm going for a medium-short cut, one that covers those crazy cowlicks at the nape of my neck but is shorter in front so I don't have so much heaviness on the top of my head making me feel weighed down like an old drudge. I'm also going to get (maybe) a manicure and pedicure to pamper myself--haven't pampered in a long, long time. I'm trying Salon 72; I believe it's the one Xian went to and she looks so mahvelous dahling, not that she didn't before but now she looks even hotter. I don't have any illusions that I will look that good, but it will definitely life my spirits and I need that desperately right now. Wish me luck!

Good holiday weekend

You couldn't have asked for better weather! It was a beautiful weekend to spend outdoors. The kids were visited on Sunday. The pool had just been filled, water too cold to go in, but the air was so comfortable we really didn't need the pool to enjoy the day. We had fun outdoors playing frisbee, blowing giant bubbles ALL over the place and playing card games on the picnic table. Of course, playing a card game with K is like nothing you would recognize. She makes up rules as she goes along and inevitably, she ends up with all the cards and declares herself the winner....to top that off, she puts one hand on her belly, the other behind her back and starts bowing and saying, "Thank you, thank you!" Sheesh! She wants kudos for everything she does. R has fantastic hand/eye coordination when it comes to PS2 action games and PC games but I have to say, as much as I love that young boy, he can't catch a frisbee with any finesse. I hope he practices a lot and gets better. J had to pay him a dollar if he caught a frisbee toss. He finally did, and sweetie that he is, he immediately gave it to his sister---awwww! Yes, we had our lobster dinner and it was a little bit of heaven, messy and buttery, (incredibly expensive - thank you red tide) but oh so delicious! And strawberry shortcake for dessert so we waddled our way through the rest of the evening. Our complex had their own fireworks display in the tennis courts so we didn't have to go far for celebrating. We didn't make it to Boston for the Pops and fireworks but we did watch them on TV; not the same, but better than missing it entirely. I think Boston does the best job of celebrating. When we have actually been there in person, it is exciting and fun and doesn't feel threatening at all. Hampton Beach fireworks' crowd mostly feels scary, though the fireworks are nice.

July 4 hikers 

Of COURSE he's responsible!

I get told I am a nag and acting like his mother...hmmmph! Well, how responsible is he behaving when he leaves the gas grill on overnight, for 12 hours?? And leaves the latch open on the back gate and the back door unlocked all night? Is this supposed to make me feel safe and protected? Like my man is taking good care to see that I am safe? Nope! It's more like a forgetful child who needs to be reminded of the same things day in and day out and then complains. Nag? I think not! More like, okay if you won't be careful on your own, I'm gonna have to remind you that you are now an adult male and supposed to have responsibilities in your life now. Don't let me go to bed thinking I'm going to be sleeping soundly in a safe, secure setting...don't let me think the car is being taken care of correctly because you are the one driving that car.....3000 mile oil changes ARE a necessity. Cleaning, vacuuming, washing the car...those are all important too. I have my own car to think about--I don't need to add yours to my list of things to deal with. Don't tell me you will bring home milk and then forget 9 times out of 10 that you said you'd do that. And on and on and on--It really sucks being the only responsible adult in a relationship...so really, start acting like an adult so I can get on with my own shit.

Lob-stah!

I LOVE lobster! I am really craving a lobster dinner...it's going to have to happen this long weekend...I can't go much longer without one. Steaming or boiling lobster up at home and melting a huge gob of butter and having that butter slip down my arm after I dunk a chunk of lobster in the butter and raise the lobster up to my lips....mmmmmmmmm, it's much better at home because you can wear a towel if you need to and really get down and dirty into the eating of the lobster. At home, you can strip down and shower afterward if need be. Restaurants inhibit you. And after the lobster, I think I want a big dish of strawberries and whipped cream, maybe with a shortcake somewhere in there. This is terrible~ like a pregnant craving ~ but not! Decadent long weekend, here I come!

Shades of Jerry Springer

Well, maybe not quite as trashy as Jerry Springer, but certainly more than I could ever imagine being involved in!! Man in Rm 7 tried to do himself in...didn't want to live any more. Here's how it started---the man, his wife, her mother, AND her step-mother all drinking together....and oh, by the way, they all live together at one address, in a duplex with an apartment over the garage. It's hot, humid and they're all drinking and swimming in the pool and having a good time together. The mother decides that she's really turned on by her son-in-law and starts to get cozy with him, rubbing herself on him. Her daughter starts yelling and telling her to knock it off and screeches at her husband for being open to her mother's advances. He claims innocence. The mother says she's just kidding, ease up girl, take a chill pill. The daughter stomps off into the house fuming, not wanting any part of the drinking pool party any more. BIG mistake. The daughter stays in the house for about an hour sobering up, cooling off, for whatever reason. Anyway, she decides maybe she'll go back and join the party and have a couple more drinks with them. She walks out the door only to see her own mother giving her husband a BJ...All hell breaks loose! The names are being called. The wife swears she never wants to have anything to do with hubby again...and as for her mother, well, she KNEW she never wanted to live around that bitch anyway! Get her out of here, never want to see either of you again!! She storms off. (I am assuming the stepmother was watching the BJ, ya think??) The husband, feeling great remorse, does not want to live without his beloved wifey. He declares life is not worth living without her so he's going to kill himself. He runs into the kitchen and takes a whole bottle of pills. The step-mother calls an ambulance and contacts her stepdaughter and tells her that her husband has OD'd, and they follow the ambulance to the hospital....turns out the man OD'd on MetaboLife diet pills....I don't know, what do you think?? Do you think, he thought if he could get real skinny, real fast, he would die!?!? What's wrong with this guy? Does he really believe all the hype about MetaboLife? Puh-leez! They never work as good as they claim!

Six Year Old Saab

Who would have thought I would get so much pleasure out of a 6 year old Saab? I'm so glad I decided to get it though. I could have gone for a new vehicle, but for the same price as this Saab, I wouldn't have been able to get very many bells and whistles. I LOVE this car and it doesn't matter to me if anyone else likes it or not. It brings me great pleasure and that's what is important, right? I have heated leather seats both front and back seats, a/c that blows out of so many different ducts, front and back, the back seat folds down so I can put Daisy in the way back without wrecking the leather seats; she just hops up into the hatchback and is happily looking at the world going by. The power seats adjust and there are four settings to save your personal settings so if anyone else gets in and adjusts the seat, you can adjust it back to your own setting by pressing one button....magic! It also has a CD changer that sits in the back out of the way, power windows, power mirrors, power roof, tachometer, automatic temperature control, computerized gas gauge, trip odometer, remote keyless entry, turbo power, front and side air bags, rear side air bags, etc. I just have the best time and I haven't let J drive it yet....I may NEVER let him drive it. It's my baby and I don't have to entrust it to anyone else if I don't want to!!!! So I get into my Saab and turn on my tunes and cruise on down the road smiling like a fool---it's not a bad way to start or finish a day. Simple pleasures for simple people...I guess that's me!

Sick Day

I felt miserable, dizzy, congested, raw throat and exhausted, so I took a sick day. I crashed back in my bed, my haven, and promptly went back to sleep, waking each time one nostril clogged up and I found myself breathing through my mouth. I hate mouth-breathing. Could feel myself going down into a restful sleep and the dratted phone rings. It's James Earl Jones. No really...James Earl Jones. He has the most distinctive voice. He wanted to know if I'd received my DSL set-up kit yet and if so, what was I waiting for? Why not install it now? Since it was a recording, I hung up about half way through it and threw the phone on the floor. After blowing my nose with a thousand more tissues, I settled into my nest of pillows and blankets again and managed to get a couple hours sleep. My beautiful wonderful dog laid down on the floor next to the bed and contented herself with waiting for me to get up and pay attention to her. She's so easy....as long as she's near me, all's right with her world. The next time I woke up, I toddled downstairs to get some coffee and take the dog out....after all, her bladder is only so big and I figured the fresh air might blow some of those cob webs out of my head. No sooner did I get back into my bed and settle in again, but the damn phone rings again. This time it's J. He wants to know if I'm okay and what I'm doing....what do you THINK I'm doing?? I'm TRYING TO HEAL. He got the hint after a couple of minutes of me grunting at him; it was the closest thing to talking I could accomplish. I hadn't used my voice except to say hello each time the phone rang. After a couple more sleep opportunities, I got up to refill my drink....drinking and peeing the two most strenuous things I wanted to do today. That phone rang again...it's was James Earl again, repeating his message to me.....I talked back to him (it wasn't pleasant); it didn't help. He wasn't listening. This time I listened all the way to the end, hoping that this will be the last call James Earl feels he needs to make to assure I am up and running on DSL. I'll tell you something--that DSL had better be worth it. Now it's early evening and I'm starting to feel like I should have a little food to give my stomach something to work with. How about some nachos? They will have the added benefit of making my nose run and my eyes water....making this cold get over with more quickly?? One can only hope.

Noxious Fumes

Okay, I'm always telling J he needs to be careful with all those emissions. I worry about my dog being in the same room with him for a long time when he's releasing his noxious fumes. I'm going to email him this story so he sees just how dangerous those noxious fumes are. Here is a nominee for the Darwin award. Darwin awards are given out for the persons who die in the most stupid manner. A terrible diet and a room with no ventilation are being blamed for the death of a man who was killed by his own gas emissions. There was no mark on his body, and an autopsy showed large amounts of methane gas in his system. His diet had consisted primarily of beans and cabbage (and a couple of other things). It was just the right combination of foods. It appears that the man died in his sleep from breathing the poisonous cloud that was hanging over his bed. Had he been outside or had his windows been opened, it wouldn't have been fatal. But the man was shut up in his nearly airtight bedroom. According to the article, "He was a big man with a huge capacity for creating "this deadly gas." Three of the rescuers got sick, and one was hospitalized. Now, wouldn't that make YOU be more careful about spending time closed up with a person with that capacity to emit gas?? I just may have to put him out in the yard.

TA-DA!! 

First Recital

Awwwwww, first dance recital for K. What a little hambone! She doesn't know the meaning of stage fright. Bowing and blowing kisses to the crowd, she stole the show for her two numbers, one tap, one ballet. At their age the 3 and 4 year olds aren't really expected to follow the whole routine perfectly. Good thing since she decided to add her own little steps and twirls every now and then just to feel her tu-tu swirling around her and to elicit more clapping so she could bow and kiss. What a funny kid!

Gray Hair and Lasers

Sure, sure they advertise laser hair removal all over the place, promising wondrous results...I called and asked Dr M's office what a 5 minute treatment would do for me. I have a few chin/lip "whiskers" (thanks to the French ancestry) I'd like to get rid of permanently. I used to have electrolysis, which wasn't too painful and actually worked pretty well as long as you keep up with it. I stopped after a while because the money was tight. I now have about 5 dark hairs that I pluck on a regular basis, and then there's a couple of occasional pop-ups that I banish as well. So the staff faxes me some info on it. I'm ready to spend the $75 for a 5 minute treatment thinking, "this is it! I won't have to hunt those suckers down anymore. " hmmmm, well it turns out that laser hair removal doesn't work on fine hairs and doesn't work on gray hairs. That's most of what I might want to use this on. The preparation involves shaving that's right, shaving....WHO WANTS TO START SHAVING? You can't pluck or wax and you can't depilitate before laser treatment. You have to shave the area the day before. One treatment doesn't get rid of it all. You have to go back for a series of treatments....this could get VERY expensive, for 5 little darkish gray/white hairs that annoy me on a regular basis. I think I'll stick to plucking or debilitating and hope for an eventual dying off of those follicles and then I can retire my tweezers and Nair.

What's all this about moving cheese?

Okay the boss gives us this lovely little book about moving cheese and expects us to welcome the wonderful new changes of adding more work into our daily schedules. Now, not only do we schedule appointments, but now we pre-register the folks, make sure to get pre-auths, and in our spare time, we get to call the folks and bug them at home to pre-reg before their appointments. I think we're multi-tasking enough but this place is always changing our duties. I wouldn't mind taking on the new stuff if some of the old responsibilities were taken away. OR, here's an idea....pay us MORE MONEY to take on these new tasks. Yes, we may act like Superwomen, but damn it...we all have our limits! We can't do everything perfectly when our heads are spinning with details. NO WONDER we like to relax with a few drinks. Poor C even lets people cut her hair when she's relaxing....and I have a pet moth named Vincent who visits when I'm relaxing... Don't you think our "customers" will be crankier the longer they have to wait on the phones? I know I would be. So I say get rid of the old PI charts and give us more money to do more work and expect more errors and less accuracy. Then maybe we will be a little happier with that ever elusive "cheese" we're chasing. Did I emphasis the MONEY aspect enough???

Vincent

It must be the drugs I am taking. They give me all sorts of crazy dreams, with enough things that MIGHT be real to sometimes make me think I have really experienced them. The drugs are supposed to be helping me to get my back pain-free...I'm not sure it's helping there, but I AM sleeping quite well. :) Anyway, on to Vincent... On Sunday, I noticed a moth sitting on the wall in the living room, above my reach, so I just watched him. I figured if he moved lower I could "help" him to leave my abode. He stayed there all day, not moving. J came home and noticed the moth too. I told him he'd been sitting there all day and would he please remove him for me? J said, "No, leave him alone. He's not hurting anything." Monday, the moth had disappeared. I don't know where, I saw no signs of him anywhere, so I didn't give him another thought. This morning while I was still groggy and trying to down some coffee to get me up and running, J noticed the moth had returned and was on a wall behind me. He said, "Look, Vincent!" I looked at him like he had three heads. "You named him???" J just grinned at me. I don't talk much until I have a full cup of coffee in me so there isn't much conversation at the start of our days. After I went upstairs and got ready for work, I came down to gather my stuff for work. When I am in the kitchen, J can't usually hear me very well....not that he EVER hears well, but it's worse when I'm at the sink and he's in the living room. I asked him a question and he yelled, "WHAT?" And he sounded pretty cranky. So I spoke up louder and he answered me. Then I asked him another question and he said, "I CAN'T HEAR YOU!" And I said, "Someone is cranky this morning. You don't need to yell at me." He said, "You know I can't hear you. I'm not cranky." (said in a VERY cranky voice) So I thought, why not make a joke out of it so he'll stop being cranky? Again, I said, "no need to be cranky, Mean Old Man." I saw him get up and take a napkin and go after the moth on the wall. He squashed it. When I saw that I said, "Oh see how cranky you are? You squashed Vincent. You killed him!" J looked at me like I had gone completely mad. "WHO?" he said. "Vincent. Didn't you tell me you named him Vincent?" J said, "Why would I name a moth? And why would I name him Vincent? Are you smoking dope or something? Where did that come from?" I said, "You just told me this morning he was Vincent. Have you forgotten already?" He started laughing at me. "You are one crazy woman. That conversation never happened." I burst out laughing, tears rolling down my face, wheezing and trying to hold it together....did I dream that whole scene or did he say something entirely different, like, "Look, an insect." And when I asked him if he named him, he just grinned; maybe that was a coverup because he didn't hear what I said so he figured grinning was a safe response. Whatever occurred, it's a mystery to me and I'll probably never know for sure. I was SO certain he named that moth. And he's SO certain I've lost my mind....what the hell do those pills have in them anyway????

My very own Darth Vader 

Star Wars second time around

Star Wars...who would have guessed I'd be doing the Star Wars thing all over again? Does that make me ancient?? I did Star Wars the first time around with my kids, my son wanting everything SW and going to all three movies with both kids and sitting in seats sticky with gum, spilled soda, with nasty things under my feet I don't even want to LOOK to see what it is. I have to confess, I DID get into the movies and characters myself, in spite of those cinnamon bun thingies on Princess Leia's head....glad THAT didn't become a fashion statement in the real world. But this second time around, I can converse with my grandchildren about the original three movies, sort of, but there's a lot I've forgotten and now there are three NEW movies, that actually take place BEFORE the old movies, if you can follow that, and I have no idea what my boy is referring to. I am going to have to watch the three new ones, then watch the three old ones and go back and sound like the cool grandma I am so I can still be their hero. I go on eBay and bid on the original action figures for them so they can have those as well as the new ones mom buys for them. I still have some of the original ones from when D was a boy and R gets to play with those when he visits. He thinks they are as good as TREASURE. I even play Star Wars things with them. I put the Darth Vader mask on and breathe funny and say, "Luke, I am your Father!" for them while K acts like Princess Leia (no buns) and R like Luke Skywalker or C3PO, depending on his mood. Gotta be careful of that light saber though, especially when K is wielding it....she is one dangerous little midget!! Don't get her mad at you...she can really hurt you without trying. Well, I AM having fun the second time around but this time, I don't have to live and breathe Star Wars. I can go home and rest after getting into all that with them; do grown up things like take a nap so I can get some energy back to do the not so fun things like cooking, cleaning, laundry, and all that. Hey, maybe I do want to be a Star Wars nut with them!